on becoming a pastor

I've been thinking a lot about church lately.  I've recently been ordained as a pastor, so I guess that's a good thing.  I thought my years of study, my life experiences, and my life-long experience with church had prepared me well...and they had, they did.  There was a ceremony - which was exciting.  There were prayers - which made me cry.  There were friends and family - which made me feel amazingly loved.  And then....I was a pastor.  At least, I was declared a pastor.

Here's what I am realizing though....the actual "becoming," takes a bit of time, takes a little growing into.  And the truth is, even when I am worried or stressed, the "becoming" is so much more than I ever dreamed. 

On Becoming a Pastor

Flushed cheeks and shaky whisper...

with heavy hands of God's promise

on her head.

She wonders...

how the Spirit weaves hearts to churches

so delicately -

with strength of a whirlwind and the softness of a sigh.

She ponders...

how one's heart finds a new home

so quickly -

with the aching joy of bursting.

She worries, she hopes, she cries, and she laughs.

She remembers God's promise

to soothe worries, to be her hope, to wipe away tears, and be her joy.

This is, she is coming to see, what becoming a pastor means.